3 min read

WELCOME TO THE GAY CHRISTMAS

Sydney Mardi Gras is definitely a gay Christmas. It’s so big, colorful, sexy and fun - more than in any pride I’ve ever been to (and I’ve been to couple dozen around the world).

For Aussies it’s the one week in the year they’ve been preparing the whole year… in the gym. They will have to show their peacock feathers (sorry - muscles) and fight for the visitor’s attention (as everybody knows each other there). That’s the actual profile text I saw on Grindr - ‘do not message me if you live here, now it’s time to meet the foreigners’.

It took me a month to put my thoughts together, there was just so much happening in Sydney, I was living truly Laday Gaga life:

Let me tell you about the best - a total must events that happen every pride and do not disappoint (or maybe a bit sometimes).

I REMEMBER HOUSE (also called “The gay soup” by Tina Turnon). The good option to kick off with your gay Christmas is this daytime open air party in a pretty nice club a week prior the parade. It might look slightly like a circuit party, but it’s not, you will see many types of boys (most of them shirtless). The music is obviously house, but not so much of tribal house, more pop (which is great). The only problem - they definitely oversell the tickets. If you like to show off your dance moves - find some other party for that. Here you will be dancing like in the packed Japanese train. Other than that - very light and easy atmosphere, fun dancing to the stage you almost forget the overpriced and low on alcohol drinks.

MARDI GRAS POOL PARTY. The same building, different floor - in and around the pool! Australians are not shy at all - majority boys will wear their tiny speedos to show those bubble butts. Chatting, dancing, swimming (they do allow you to swim in that pool, not like in some other parties I’ve been to). A day well spent!

ARQ UNDERWEAR PARTY. I usually don’t do underwear parties as they are sleazy and the men are ugly. This one is different. Not sure why… maybe gazillion lasers make everything look better (and did I mention - I love lasers!). This night ARQ is super sweaty (for various reasons…). It’s also very packed - hopefully you will reach that water station before you pass out. Basically if you don’t like being in the crowd of sweaty boys in their underwear - that’s not a place for you. Or you could go to the balcony upstairs to observe the naked queens from above or get some other type of action (you know what I mean). After all, ARQ is still the best gay club in Sydney and you must visit either for Underwear Party or some other night.

MARDI GRAS PARADE - that’s definitely the best party for attention sluts like me. Read here about what it feels to be Beyonce for 40 minutes!

THE MAIN MARDI GRAS PARTY - 3 warehouse size rooms, 12,000 gays - it’s HUGE! The night will start in a long line with dogs searching you, then long lines to the bathrooms and finally partyyyyyy. In one room (can it even be called a room with that size?) - more pop, house music, drag queens, some show. Second (where I spend most of my night) - techno and heavier electro music, usually amazing lasers (though in 2017 they saved a bit on lasers and put some trees on the stage instead - WTF??). And the third room with some camp music - I never spent more than 15 minutes there.

There are many big gay parties, but this one is unique - all the types of the boys you can imagine. It’s also the only night a year when all the masc4masc Aussies become princesses. I already want to go back!

Besides the parties above there are tons of other parties that I wouldn’t recommend unless you’re a bigger party animal than I am. However it’s always nice to join some private parties, especially like this one which was amazing: